@Alan @Phil Premise - Script First Draft

Script Premise by on Scribd
I have put together a first draft for my script, although I know there are still a lot more things I need to figure out. This draft is more focused on how I'd like to tell it in terms of shots and screenplay, which is why the script is quite a few pages. Although there are a lot of shots, most of them will only be on screen for a short moment, and I have tried to put this together so that it still fits the time frame I am aiming for. There is much more to figure out in terms of story/character details, but writing this has helped me a lot to visualize the interior building layout, basic screenplay and how things will roughly play out. There is currently a part missing, which is how the alien actually obtains the documents that reveal the scientists' secrets. This is one of the things I need to figure out still, as it is an important point for my story.

Comments

  1. Hey Frankie - this is a characteristically filmic treatment from you - yes, it reads long, because really this is a shooting script - because it conveys all the action. Can you literally put together a step-outline version - without all the camera etc that just lays out the action scene to scene - make it fit on a single page. My instincts are that you've got something with potential here - essentially a vehicle by which you can flex your muscles as a director - but I just want to be able to 'see' the plot at its simplest; again, I don't think 'plot' is going to be too important here - like I said it's a trampoline you're bouncing on in terms of your interest in visual storytelling - but let's see it laid out at its simplest :)

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